Baby Ray, Breastfeeding, Parenthood, Sleep

The Sleep War

20 Oct , 2014  

#10m0 #babysleep #babiesarethecutestwhentheyresleeping #nopleasegotobed #cryinggrownmanaintcute

Since becoming a mom, I finally, finally know what it means by 24 hours in a day ain’t enough.

Tried to put the 10 mo bubs to sleep for his afternoon nap but the little bugger refused to. On the other hand, Pips and I were all ready to crash on the bed and enjoy family bonding in lalaland.

For over an hour, bubs and I stood on opposite sides of the fence, as I pulled out every trick in my bag to get him to sleep while he defiantly kept his peepers open and bright. I nursed him, rocked him, nursed and rocked him simultaneously to no avail. LORD RAY STOOD STRONG against my sleep assaults.

It was clear. Pips and I were both losing the war against the SLEEP LORD and LORD RAY.

Defeated, we let him climb all over us on the bed, and mustered our reserves to catch him and prevent him from avalanching himself off the bed or stuff tissue paper into his mouth. Ever so often, I gathered my hopes of him giving in to sleep and tried to nurse/side latch/rock him but was met with bright open eyes and flailing limbs at every turn.

When he refused to latch (he usually latches to sleep with me around. My boobies are my secret sleep weapons), we even tried introducing some competition to get him to reclaim his land.

Pips pretended to nurse, and Lord Ray, who was all preoccupied with claiming the Tissue Country, suddenly spied danger and competition. Immediately, he crawled over, used his teeny pointer to forcibly flick Pips’ nose, elbowed Pips outta the way while shoving his face into my direct line of sight with his mouth wide open.

Papapips all pooped out while Lord Ray is on 200% energy run

I caught him in a cradle position and began my sleep assault again. However, once Pips settled back onto the bed, Lord Ray declared the state of emergency over, and struggled to get out of my cradle hold again. This guy is one sneaky tactician.

God. Did I say I was sleepy? LIKE REALLY SLEEPY?

Finally, after an hour of (parental only. Very evident from the outset that it was a one-sided affair) struggle, I pushed my butt off the bed, and waved the white flag. Lord Ray was not gonna grant me my nap, and the sooner I realise it, the better.

Sensing a change in my stance, the little lord started babbling commands at me, or perhaps, mocked me in babybabble. I swung him up and put him in the baby carrier, ready for one last fight.

Yes, I was going to take out the babywearing sleepydust. My last resort.

Pips got up too and I gallantly waved him off,”Please go to bed. There is no point in both of us going down (literally and figuratively) together.”

Pips waved Lord Ray and I goodbye at the gate, “Ok, when you come up, I’ll switch with you. We can take turns.”

I would just like to interject at this point that as parents, sometimes, there is little time for romance. Pips could be all romantic and say he’d accompany his dearest wife and baby for a walk, but when sleep beckons thus, it makes much more practical sense to go WWE and do a tag team.

We parents do what we can to survive.

So anyway, I looked Pips with what I reckon is steely determination in my eyes, “I don’t intend to fail. He’ll be sleeping when I’m back.”

Pips just laughed. I wonder if it’s because of the cocky confidence I must have exuded (which jarred against our earlier pathetic failures) or it was simply a laugh of exasperation tinged with defeat and hope in one strange little uncomely swirl.

Anyway, I did my utmost best to walk with a sprightly gait, a bounce in every single step. Lord Ray was no longer babbling. Nor squirming. In 5 minutes flat, he was out like a light. I WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO!

Oh sweet, sweet pillow, my sugar bed, imma coming home to ya!

Sweet, sweet victory! This Little Man is one rasengan ball of energy!

After putting Lord Ray on my bed (yes, he has claimed territory over my bed too. He’s quite the little victor…), I, who have been waiting for this precious, precious moment, n o   l o n g e r   f e l t   s l e e p y. I was awake, wide awake.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…… I am thus undone by myself. Sighs. And this is why I am blogging. Yet another day in parenthood.

The constant fight to get our kids to sleep, and people wonder why we don’t paint the town red like we used to.

Dude. One word.






*** Note *** Halfway through writing this article, Lord Ray flailed his arms and threatened to flip. Flipping is his way of forcing himself to wake up when his body isn’t ready to. I tried patting him but he just squirmed even more. Darn. Laidback measures like patting ain’t gonna work this time.

Alarmed, I quickly scooped him up and nursed him. On cue, his mouth opened and latched perfectly. He suckled for awhile before sleepily opening his eyes. Oh crap. if his eyes remains open for too long, he’s gonna be wide awake! I’ve been through this drill before!

Immediately, I began the full-on assault. I nursed, rocked, and rubbed his head alternately, sometimes sweeping my hand near his eyes so he’d close them.

We were in that fire-engine RED zone where he’d move his hands or legs, sometimes with eyes opened, sometimes with eyes closed. It’s hard to tell who the victor would be. To the parents, non-parents, aunties, uncles and grandparents who say it is a bad habit to nurse or rock or WORSE, nurse AND rock your child, it’s either you have a great sleeping kid (I’m JEALOUS!) or it’s been far too long (or perhaps you aren’t one) since you had a kid.

To hell with bad habits man. I haven’t seen a grown adult needing to be nursed or rocked to sleep so this war, I’m winning. It’s fine if I lose the daily sleep battles with all these cheap tricks for now, it’s only for 2 or 3 years? He’ll outgrow it, so I ain’t too worried about that!

Anyway, with my full-on concentration, I am happy to report that for the past 1.5 hour and counting, Lord Ray is still sleeping. Woohoo!

Seriously, babies are the cutest when they’re asleep haha.

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2 Responses

  1. Eunice says:

    yes!! Agree with you on the diff tricks to get them to sleep! My girl is 3.5 months and she fights her naps ALL the time and I use all the tricks u mention- rock and/or nurse and/or stroke head/bum/swing etc – at diff stages of the fight just to get her to nap!

    • projectjasmine says:

      IKR… I wonder why they just won’t go to sleep by themselves when they are obviously tired.I love to sleep so much!

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